When was the last time you were truly yourself?
It is not easy to be yourself, but it's an ease when you have recognized how much easier it makes life.
Probably the stupidest and most meaningless phrase we ever get thrown at us before job interviews or our first day at a new school is, "just be yourself”. Parents and marketing agencies think that they can make us connect with what we know about our innermost "self" without thinking too much. Yet how do we connect if no one shows us how to. When our society forces us into a rigid set of values that stifle our breath.
I can still remember my supposed seven-year-old "self" who brought friendship books home with him every week. Today, I can admit that I first began to deceive "myself" as a child and that I frequently carry this burden with me to this day. Why until today, you may ask? Well - you can't teach an old dog new tricks, can you?
So, in friendship books, I went from being seven-year-old Lexi, who loved to sing Carmina Burana with his father and loved serving as an altar boy on Sundays, to a football-playing kid called Alex, whose favourite song was All Summer Long by Kid Rock. And what else set me apart from you and the others? The other half of me "loved" riding and Hot N Cold by Katy Perry. Apart from that, in tests, I only ever copied from you as did you from me.
What's especially perverse is that the kids we teased (aka bullied) at school because they were different, we now have the greatest admiration for, precisely because they are so authentic. Yes, our world is frequently a ruthless place, but that doesn't mean that we have to be ruthless ourselves.
How other people judge you is their problem. How much you let yourself be influenced by it is up to you.
So why in public day in and day out do you force yourself to be someone you are not? If you want to why not eat fries and tomato sauce in the canteen? Why not say in a job interview that your car ride to work every morning is like a karaoke party Why not push to the front in the queue if you are an inconsiderate a*******? How other people perceive you is their problem. How much you let it affect you is up to you.
Yes, friends, a good job etc. are important. However, they are only good for us in the long run if they allow us to be loved and valued for who we really are and vice versa. Unless you are honest with yourself, nothing and no one will ever love you for who you are.
We have to stop rewarding people by being someone else, because that is not how we bring out the best in them. Not everyone has the courage to be real, but we all have the capacity. What we need primarily are role models and secondly an environment which is free of constant judgement and debasement. Only an environment where we know we will not be judged makes it possible for us to come even close to who we really are. We need a protected space to be able to do all of this in, because when we are real, we are also at our most vulnerable.
Where we are real, we are also most vulnerable.
This argument in no way contradicts the performance narrative at all, rather that you will see that people work, love and create even more passionately than before when they are valued for themselves and not for the masks they wear. People sense the authenticity of others and see it as a call and encouragement to reveal their real selves.
So when was the last time you condemn someone for copying / imitating when you should have been talking to them about why they chose to copy someone else's entry in their friendship book, because they hated the idea of appearing "uncool"? Have you ever asked yourself whether your employees do their work properly, because they are free to do as they see fit and feel appreciated by those around them or, for the opposite reason, because they are simply afraid of stepping out of line or, in other words, of being free and being themselves?
Today. I can admit to being ashamed of my seven-year-old self. Which means nothing other than I have moved on. I no longer worry about being uncool when I'm myself and don't fit the image that others have. At the same time, however, I still let myself be pushed into certain patterns. A few weeks ago, however, I received another friendship book in which I was able prove to myself that it doesn't have to be difficult to be proud of who and what you are. I'm not afraid of being uncool, because I see now that the cool kids from back then are not quite as cool as I thought.
And now over to you, when was the last time you were really yourself? If we are not (yet) ourselves in the real world, why don't we take the first steps together - in a world that makes it easy for us to get started. In a world that only accepts us for who we really are. This is the most important step to your new customers, employees and your very own personal story - the uncool one that will inspire your community.
Using a facade covers our greatest values.
We have to stop being someone else, imitating someone else, playing different personalities for different platforms and situations - be yourself!.
It doesn't have to be difficult to be proud of who I am - the best of me
Ready to get started
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